An Sincere Assessment of Flamingo Property’s $82 Spicy Strawberry Fruit Snacks


For my total life, I’ve been a fruit snacks fanatic. As a toddler, I used to be indoctrinated by the seemingly limitless 90s fruit-snack-sphere: Shark Bites, Gushers, Enjoyable Fruits, and (deep lower) Fruit Wrinkles. To this present day, my movie-theater snack of selection is Welch’s Fruit Snacks. What, like they’re just for youngsters or one thing? One thing concerning the gummy texture, the colourful flavors, the bite-sized format — all of it simply provides up for me into one thing better than the sum of its elements, a marvel of recent meals science.

I just lately heard that Los Angeles-based chic-cool-stuff-brand Flamingo Property — maker of what’s most likely the world’s finest seasonal meals subscription field and a Swedish princess cake candle that might make you cry with its olfactory magnificence, amongst different issues — provides an grownup model of the fruit snack. Moreover, this grownup snack is out there for the notable worth of $82 per 6.5-ounce jar. Now, these aren’t simply any fruit snacks; colloquially known as “Spicy Strawberry Fruit Snacks” on the model’s web site, their longer and extra formal identify is the Juicy Strawberry Spicy Guajillo Key Lime Squeeze Fruit Snack. My intrigue swelled.

I learn the web site’s copy for this mysterious product, as soon as, after which once more.

“We took the lushest, ripest Strawberries from Harry’s Berries and dusted them with the intense spice of Guajillo Chiles grown by Boonville Barn Collective, including a squeeze of Key Lime and a pinch of Large Sur Sea Salt. Then we gently dehydrated them to protect their juiciness and focus all of that quintessential Strawberry taste. The result’s these small dried wonders. Insanely addictive, candy, tart and spicy with a tasty chew. Really nature’s sweet.”

At this juncture, I paused. These “small dried wonders” sound like a poet’s interpretation of the fruit snacks served on the poolside eating menu in heaven: the one fruit snack to rule all of them. The antidote. The fruits of my wishes, as a fruit snack lover. Are you aware about Harry’s Berries? They’re, like, the Platonic very best of strawberries; they’re a Southern California sensation set aside by their distinctive high quality, taste, sweetness, and jamminess. The strains for Harry’s Berries at any Los Angeles-area farmer’s market are typically lengthy, snaking, and unrelenting. To make these berries right into a chewy snack… extraordinary, beforehand, so far as I do know.

“We’re honored to accomplice with the inimitable Harry’s Berries through the use of their beautiful Strawberries. This small-batch household farm has been rising for over 50 years, and is the true definition of generational farming. Their berries signify what Strawberries ought to be at their finest — harvested when completely ripe, ruby purple, and candy. They’re Licensed Natural, make use of sustainable rising practices, and have a deep dedication to stewardship of the land.”

I imagined transcendence. I can admit that I yearned. I noticed scorching individuals consuming the fruit snacks on TikTok and Instagram and felt a profound sense of FOMO. A must know.

Lo and behold, I just lately turned a recipient of a jar of those storied creations. However might chewing on a Spicy Strawberry Snack so robustly exceed the enjoyment of consuming a bag of saxophone-shaped Enjoyable Fruit?

Jar procured. Photo by the author

Jar procured. Picture by the creator

First impressions: the Strawberry Spicy Snacks undoubtedly really feel premium. The jar and label have a a lot completely different presence than the skinny plastic or foil-lined paper packets from which I’ve traditionally eaten fruit snacks. A jar feels… artisanal. Open it and also you’ll see dozens of darkish, shiny berries, glimmering like rubies with a syrupy, crystalline sweetness as a substitute of the satin end of a conventional fruit snack. Did I point out that they’re made with nearly fully natural elements (apart from the ocean salt — salt can’t legally be licensed “natural”)?

Naturally, you need to understand how they style, what it’s prefer to eat them. The reply is: surprisingly advanced. At first, the stickiness was a little bit of a shock — they’re not gooey, however they undoubtedly don’t have that type of cornstarch-driven anti-stick expertise present in, say, Welch’s, or the fruit snacks of the 90s. They’re nonetheless undoubtedly finger meals, however you have to to offer your arms a fast wipe or rinse after consuming. Chopsticks could possibly be an asset right here. That mentioned, I benefit from the mouthfeel of the tiny seeds embedded within the strawberries’ surfaces, regardless of internal references in my psyche that liken jammy, seedy fruit to alien pod individuals.

As for the flavour, it begins with a slight tartness that morphs right into a candy, jelly-like, basic strawberry taste that quickly provides method to a stunning quantity of warmth. They’re not joking — these fruit snacks are unquestionably spicy; they’re spicier than Cholula scorching sauce, which I generously doused on my eggs this morning, however not spicy sufficient to induce any sweating. I’d say they’re on par with scorching Takis or Flamin’ Sizzling Cheetos — there’s a gradual and delicate burn nevertheless it fades inside about 15 seconds of ending every chunk. Suppose an elevated, much less tropical and extra berry-forward interpretation of chile mango.

The TL;DR is that I can affirm they’re scrumptious; a Harry’s Berry marinated in sugar, lime juice, Guajillo chile, and cayenne, because it seems, creates a chewy, tactile present of the Earth. They’re candy however in an grownup method; piquant however not in a method that’s limiting. They’re very chewy, a high quality which I each take pleasure in and, as a TMJ sufferer, lament. Some berries (sorry, “snacks”) require a strong 15+ seconds of forceful chewing. In truth, I like them quite a bit, however would solely eat just a few at a time. Savor them. Don’t let the magic turn into routine.

As for the worth tag — which, at $82 per jar, is undoubtedly eye-popping — let’s break it down a bit. Flamingo Property says that there are three kilos of Harry’s Berries in each jar, and a pound of Harry’s Berries prices $20 (or, from some sellers, almost $30). Positive, Flamingo Property certainly buys them wholesale, however proper there, we’re taking a look at $60+ of the jar’s worth mathematically expressed by the price of the berries alone. Then there are the opposite natural elements, the cooking and drying course of, and the necessity for a revenue margin, and also you’re taking a look at $82.

Whereas it’s a discourse-worthy price ticket, it’s not terribly completely different than, say, the actually costly fruit in Japan that’s particularly developed for items and holidays— this isn’t a chill pantry addition for informal on a regular basis consumption, though if that’s a chance with the Scrooge McDuck gold swimming pool you’re working with, by all means. This isn’t a commodity that you just’re going to purchase in bulk and maintain jars of readily available always. This can be a special day fruit snack. A present fruit snack. A luxurious fruit snack. They’re a snack, and so they’re definitely fruit, however I’m undecided they fully embody the thought of a fruit snack I’ve had in my thoughts because the days of Gushers.

By the way in which, these could also be fruit snacks, however my private perception system dictates that they’re not for teenagers. Purchase your rugrats some regular gummy sweet and ship them exterior to play within the dust and develop an immune system. If Fruit Wrinkles nonetheless existed, I’d say get them a few of these. (RIP.) (Please carry again Fruit Wrinkles.)

A case could possibly be made that to ensure that the world to keep up steadiness, there should be not solely a really low-cost, accessible model of any given product, but additionally a extremely refined, elite model. There’s $6 caviar on Amazon, and there may be $2,600 caviar at Bergdorf Goodman. There’s the $7 olive oil at Grocery Outlet and there may be the $119 olive oil at Williams Sonoma. You understand, it’s like that Byrds music — there’s a time and place for all issues.

So why wouldn’t there be $1.49 fruit snacks and likewise $82 fruit snacks? And if the latter exists, why wouldn’t we need to strive them… at the very least as soon as?

Spicy Strawberry Fruit Snacks can be found at Flamingo Property.



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